Sunday, August 19, 2007

Opening Section of Time and the Soldier

I've decided to post the very beginning of TatS here, just in case anyone cares to critique it.

Please bear in mind that this is still a rough draft, and what I'm about to put up here might change. It hasn't been polished. It really is rough.

Okay, I'm delaying because I'm a bit nervous about doing this. Here it is, the beginning of the novel:


Gulp! Please be kind. I'm soooo nervous!!!


Chris said...

I don't know... I think it's going to be hard to get folks to look at this, when it's so like many other submissions they see. You might want to try something a little flashier, to grab their attention. "BLAM! The..." perhaps?

alternatefish said...

Wow! It grabbed me by the throat and shook! I must have more. Please please please, tell me what happens next?

David said...

Okay, okay. I didn't know if you guys were ready for this. Here's the actual first paragraph. Hold tight! I hope you can handle this! If not, it's your own fault. Here it is:

The first blast came at dawn on February 8, 1945. Two men died in that instant. Everyone else was already dead.

Chris said...

Okay, in all seriousness, now I really want to read more.

Kristen said...

The "h" does it for me - I'm now excited about reading the full first chapter.